Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to one and all...

It's been a ho ho ho week and i'm really looking forward to ushering in the new year with a big bang...

I can't help being in the holiday mood and i have been since last friday... Here's the lowdown on my xmas celebrations...

Friday 23rd Dec
Headed off after work to meet Sen and Ernie... Cracking out brains on where to have our dinner and we decided on Tiong Bahru Market, cos Sen, being back from Sweden, was craving for Char Siew Rice. Ha. It was a great idea seeing that town would be a madhouse... We devoured chwee kuey, chicken wings, char siew rice and more!

Then we decided to pick Yun up before going over to Altivo's @Mount Faber for drinks. While turning up the many slopes, Yun and I were feeling kinda nostalgic, cos this was where we used to have our track training. It was insane, i didn't know how we managed to make it up the hill with our only our "ka"s and not a real "car".

Upon reaching there, we were told that it was pretty full and they had a full house. It was kinda unglam waiting out in the open but then was rewarded with a show of lights and fireworks atop the hill... The place was pretty nice, great view, and yummy drinks. (tip to guys: its pretty romantic too... can bring ur gals there... ) It was great catching up with the gang, seeing that we haven't met up properly for 5 mths now...


The Gang...

Yun and I ...

Ernie, Me and Sen in his poseur beanie

Saturday 24th Dec
Christmas Eve and the age old tradition of a party at my aunt Julyn's place. I would never miss my family's xmas party for the world. Minus the huge turkey and hams, the laughter, the caroling, the warmth is irreplacable. Of course we had the Present Opening ceremony as well, and we had to sing at the top of our lungs and go through half the book of christmas carols before we could start ripping the wrappers... I am 23 but it certainly is fun gathering around all the young cousins and see them being initiated into this family ritual, and Rayner, who is 4 this year, is just in awe of how we sing so loudly and happily.

Me & My cous, Mel...Love her to death...

Headed over to Ans' place after that, and had an 'exclusive' private party with just Ans, Marilyn, Ernie and myself. We knocked ourselves out with bbq chicken wings, nuggets, crabsticks and hoegarden while laughing ourselves silly at the stupid Chow Yun Fatt retro show that was on channel 8. Then we decided to play TABOO where of course (ahem) the girls trashed the boys, though they insist that the hourglass timer thingy was spoilt... An intimate gathering of friends, something that completes a nice xmas eve...

Sunday 25th Dec
We just couldn't get enough of the each other the other night, so the track gang decided to spend xmas day together! We met up at Jason's place and hung out for most part of the afternoon, chatting, eating and playing silly games... we ended up teaching ernie how to play orthodox mahjong also! Then after gobbling up the char kway teow from Zion Road.. we decided to go for a Karaoke sesh at like 11 pm! Hmmm i can't really sing and i am most of the time out of tune... throw in bad chinese and you have a really amateur singer on hand. I was content with being Yun and Sen's backup singer, doing the "oooohs" and the "aaaahhs" when the song calls for it. Ha. It was great, mad, silly fun.... rounded up with more FOOD! we of course went to chinatown to grab some Chang Cheng porridge.. hee..

Yun and I again... Acting like the guitar is a pipa...

Ernie + Me and Eeyore

as you can tell, i partied like mad... and then i had to sleeeeeeep... ahah.

It was a magical christmas and i hope that 2006 will be just as great...

p/s: i just realised that if you're a foodie, u can get tips from where i get my hawker fare cos my friends really can EAT. haha.

This post is long overdue and here's a nice pic from Mama Kate's Wedding...



This is half of our gang... but its the nicest pic around. Had to blacken uncle's eyes so that no one would recognise him. He thinks he is Li Nanxing and he doesn't want people to recognise him.

Weddings are indeed the nicest and sweetest events to attend. It is infectious and it is heart-warming. To see Mama Kate so happy, is really nice. She is a great person and she deserves nothing less.

Right now, i am already dreaming of a white christmas... MERRY CHRISTMAS to all of you. May all your special wishes come true and may every christmas be this special...

It has been awhile since i wrote... and btw for anyone who wanted to know... the stupid victoria's secrets sale was crappy. Went for the mango one and was bumped left, right and center by the stupid aunties.... argh.

Randomness in my post today, just whatever that pops into my mind about the past week or so...

• work work work all of last week cos of my event at united square... tiring but kinda glad its over.

• finally confirmed New Year's plans with my dear track gang.... sen, yun and ernie. Really looking forward to spending some quality time with you guys.

• had a surprise visit at work from a special person on sunday, who came all the way just to have Ben & Jerry's and to stroll down nicely-lit orchard rd tog. (despite only sleeping for a few hours the previous night)
  

• we shared the Mix N' Match special with Cookie Dough, Raspberry something and Brownie fudge. It was divine...

• shopped shopped shopped but have yet to get all my presents for my friends and family

• Met the council gang for dinner @ PS on friday nite... nice gathering!
  

• Mike is back in town!
  

• Had exclusive press preview tics to watch Narnia (thanks to HJ) and both of us enjoyed the movie tremendously. merci beaucoup...

• went for dinner with ZM, Addy and Lichuan @ crystal jade again... farewell dinner for my dear haolian friend who is leaving for Finland next week. It's exchange season again and many people are leaving... well, at least i got a ride in the lexus... *smirks*

Well, there is plenty more to add, but for now, i am just taking in the christmas spirit... enjoying the time i have till the end of the year to finally get over this somewhat horrid year and to begin the next on a positive note.

I am looking forward to the family gatherings, the friends, the laughter and the company on this special festive season... it is especially heartwarming...

right now, i know at least i have something to look forward to in starting the new year, someone to start it with and hopefully it will erase the awful memories in this past year... it's time to let everything go and the baggage go... nothing else matters except the 2 people in it.....

someone told me " the journey is worth every moment of it" .... i guess having company on this journey is more than enough to make me smile.

i am officially excited.

Christmas is coming and i am really looking forward to a great time... Already got a few meet-ups planned, a family xmas tradition (meaning lotsa turkey & ham) to anticipate, many presents to buy... esp for the people who matter....

argh, so much going on, so little time... but i'm gonna enjoy it, doing the routine, running around, grabbing stuff off the rack with fervour and putting a smile on people's faces when they open their presents. I think, thats all that really matters in gift-giving. You do feel a warm tingly feeling no matter how macho you are, when you see someone appreciating the gift you bought them...

Christmas is also a time where very sharp, and acute merchants get to organise a sale of their wares, so as to bait stupid women (and men, for that matter) to go and spend a ton of money on things they absolutely don't need. I was intending to cut down on the spending this month so that i could get more presents... but... i just popped by to the CREATIVE sale near my office today and spent $$ on weird things like earphones! (damn my office location, it is the area with constant sales!)

more importantly, i saw an invitation in the mail to...

THE VICTORIA'S SECRET PRIVATE SALE

i can't resist... so i am heading down tml with my shopping kaki. There goes that lesson in financial planning... and so much about saving... :)

p/s: i think they should stop bullshitting us by putting the word private on it... it doesn't mean anything at all when half of singapore's female population will be there, and the other half, have already gone home, done with their great buys. hmmf.

Would you rather have no one care about you or have someone care so much that it makes you feel loved?

Seems like a one answer question, ain't it?

Maybe everything may seem really important to me, but the most important thing in my life, i seem to have really neglected... my health.

It's been a long while since anyone cared when i sneezed, anyone made sure i sat with a cushion so that i won't get a backache, and anyone made sure i saw the Doc when i fell ill.

It's also been a long while since i got a huge 'scolding' from this someone about putting everything else above health. I mean, it's never a shiok feeling getting scolded by another, reprimanded for not doing the right thing, taking the correct course of action... it sucks to have someone tell you that you are wrong.

after feeling spurts of anger and indignance, i suddenly calmed down and realised what it meant and how much it took for him to scold me for not taking care of myself. Its kinda silly but it does feel good to be scolded sometimes, for the reason that the scolder does care a whole lot about the scoldee... more than i ever knew.

so after getting scolded and realising how i disappointed him, i promise to take gd care of myself... with everything i can do.

but i found myself smiling at the memory of being scolded...

FAQs
(Ten questions that you would wanna ask the blogger but is too paiseh to, just in case you get bitch-slapped by her)

Q: So, are you two together again?
A: For those wondering, the answer is nope, we're not.

Q:Why?
A: Because it's complicated and the timing is not right.

Q: So, what is your status with him now?
A: We're friends, best friends, 2 people who enjoy each other's company a whole lot and 2 people who really care about each other. Maybe, we are more than friends, and maybe, we will always be special in each other's hearts, but then again, it doesn't mean we hafta be together.

Q: Aren't you upset about what happened?
A: Sometimes, you can't just get hung up with the past, only when you see beyond it, then you will see the future. I'm no saint and he's no devil either.

Q: Then why do you blog and post so much about him?
A: Cos i hang out with him a whole lot, and he makes my day. Other than that, he is just one of my best friends, and don't we all post about our friends?

Q: What's gonna happen to you guys?
A: I dunnno what will happen in the future, come what may. But right now, i am happy with my life and more than happy to have him in my life.

Q: Aren't you just giving cryptic and politically correct answers?
A: darhhling... don't we all love politically correct answers? But, no i am not, this is really how it is. Contrary to popular belief, we don't lead the drama life that you think we do, sometimes, life isn't just all about the drama, it only happens to phases of you life, most of the other times, it's just simple and boring.

Q: What do you wish for in the future?
A: Sounds cliched, but more than anything else, i want him to be happy. He's someone who deserves all the happiness in the world, and if i had i wish, i wish that he would be, with or without me in the equation.

Q: Are you happy now?
A: Happier than i was before. I am thankful for it, and it is only after extreme sadness that you can appreciate happines truly.

Q: And the all important last question, do you still love him?
A: He knows how i feel and i know how he feels... and i think, that's enough.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yeap, sounds terribly narcissistic doesn't it. But, i guess its high time to clarify matters, cos people have been asking about it, and i thought that maybe i led them to think otherwise.

Maybe all of you would think why i would reveal so much to everyone reading this cos not all of them are friends... I just think that this is me, i don't hide my feelings or hide who i really am. This is me. I don't mind people asking and more than often i am flattered by their interest in my otherwise mundane life. (and i know, we are all voyeuristic... moi aussi)

Some of you do sincerely hope that things will work out well for us, and i hope so too, but right now, we are giving ourselves time and space, to learn to grow as individuals, and not forgoing our friendship and the companionship that is irreplacable.

Thanks for all the concern and allowing moi to indulge in a little self-chat... =)

someone commented that its been really nice to see the change in the tone of my blog... from what it was a few months ago...

"you sound happier" was the comment said...

Right at this moment, a wave of sadness overwhelmed me. I mean, don't mind me sounding whiny, but every now and then, everyone has a little down time to be emo. And i happen to be Miss EMO. Things flashed through my mind, and i thought of how scary the past was... and i really believe that happiness is a journey, not a destination.

I've been on a long long journey.... and so many things have changed. Most importantly, i am at least walking in the right direction. I'm not sure if i am near my destination or not, but for now, the journey seems pretty alright... Its just been too much to handle in the past, and i think i've come too far down the road for it to go back to where it used to be... the past was scary and i never want that for anyone.

All i can say is though the past still comes back to hurt you, haunt you or remind you, at least now i have the strength to look into the future. And this strength is helping me conquer the demons in the past, and the pain lessens each time i look back. I guess, there will be a time when it all goes away...

at least... for now, the coke bottle is enough ;)

the weekend was great... tons of food, laughter and friends...

3 pleasures that u simply could do with more... hee, human beings are greedy.

Yan came back for the weekend and we simply had to plan something special for him. So, we picked him up at the airport and started our day of devouring food....

Foodlist:
1) Changi Village Nasi Lemak
2) Katong Laksa
3) Yong He Beancurd & You Tiao
4) Buona Vista Boneless Duck Rice
5) Al Azhar Prata

We really wanted to squeeze in Boon Tong Kee, Carrot Cake and Char Kway Teow into the list as well, but everyone was really maxed out. Will post pics when Yan uploads it...(Ren, don't worry, your presence was sorely missed.) Ha, it was damn fun going around the island, getting lost while driving the whole day and falling asleep on the Joey/Chandler armchair at Yan's place. Woohoo... i totally lurve DEC and it is proving itself to be the best month of the entire year.

Sunday at Food Republic @Wisma was equally sinful and got to catch up with my tennis shifu and his totally cool and beautiful (total understatement) GF, Marilyn. They look really great tog and more importantly, they really seem to complement each other. We had a great time debating whether the huge-ass butter at Toast Box was real... Looking forward to the ATS* Annual Christmas Party 2005 organised by the ATS alumni. HA.

"Sleighbells ring... are you listening?"

Christmas is getting close and it is my fave festive season... really looking forward to a great DEC.

*ATS = Ansley Tennis School

it is a fitting weather for a not-very-nice day. it is pouring outside and well, it seems like it is pouring around me too.

maybe christmas really is break-up season. i keep receiving bad news recently and it seems to befall those who are nearest and dearest to me. 3 very special people, close to my heart have somehow told me the news that i never wanted to hear from anyone... "she broke up with me", "she left me"...

they are severe words to hear and words that simply end a bond between 2 people. it wasn't very long ago that i went through the very same pain, and felt the loss that they felt. Now, i am reliving it again... this time through them. As they begin to tell me their pain, i feel lost. I hurt for them till it brought tears through my eyes, and sometimes i wish i could be there for them, just like they were here for me. i wanna tell them that "everything's gonna be ok" but even i don't know that.

if i could have one wish, i wish that all their pain will go away instantly. i wish that maybe they didn't have to go through what i went through... it's too hard and too cruel. maybe all i can say is that time will heal all wounds and take away all the pain.

i just hope that you are ok and just keep going despite all the pain and you will see the sun again one day.

take care my dears... you know who you are...

"Time will always heal the pain
Bring the sun and dry the rain
Things work out with time
If you want them too"
- Time, Tommy Page

i know i am xiao... its like 12+ in the morning and i can't seem to get to sleep, knowing that i will have super tired eyes tomorrow and not be able to wake up in the morning...

came back from a long day's work and went to EC house at Ikea to get a haircut. First time at the $10 hairdressing things... Hj and I decided to give it a go cos we just wanted to get our fringes trimmed. Well... my heart was kinda pumping irregularly as i was heading towards Ikea, and wondering what if i turn out super cuckoo and will regret it for the rest of the week, and the next and the next. Hj was kinda apprehensive too but we decided to give it a go anyway.

It was indeed quite thrilling as we slotted our $10 bills into the machine and an EZ-link looking card came out of the slot. Then, we had to troop over to the chairs that are labelled 1-4 and sit accordingly to the order we came. Nope, you are not supposed to leave blank spaces even though the guy before you has really bad B.O. You hafta sit in order so as not to give passers-by the wrong idea about the actual number of people in the queue. *bleah*

Oh well, of course, they always claim that they will cut your hair in 10 mins, but the wait itself is equally long, if not longer. Anyway, it is finally my turn and they opened a 'secret' cupboard to place your bags. Next, they proceed to wrap a' towel' around your neck (except that it looked more like a strip of bandage) and finally the cape-like thingy that all salons use. Of course, the hairdresser takes out a complimentary comb (which would be yours after the cut) and then starts asking you how you would like your cut...

Not wanting to destroy the rest of my hair, i decided to follow the plan and just trim my fringe. I told her i wanted bangs... the cool kind, not the china-doll or psycho lunatic kind... kinda layered and in steps... just like the rest of my hair. Oh but oh no... she did not really understand amidst all that nodding. In about 7.8 mins, i think my hair was done. I told her it was fine, not wanting anymore hair to be chopped off, so i could rescue it, before more damage. Then the last step of the cool vacuum cum hair dryer cum brush thing was used to blow off all the hair left on my face and neck...

well... i stepped out of my seat and kept my fingers crossed all the way, until i realised it was Hj's turn. She walked towards the same hairdresser that i got and the last i heard was "No, i mean i want a side-swept fringe...." I wanted to cross my toes for her so bad...

i don't think the cut was too bad... just imagine Bai Ling's fringe...



ok...maybe not sooooo bad.... but it was at least supposed to look like Ashlee...




or even better... my original idea of a really nice haircut..... the Heidi...



But... no... that's just me dreaming. I still look like me...just less hair infront... but more Bai Ling then anyone else. Well, i can only hope for it to grow out, just in time for Mama Kate's wedding. Ha.

p/s: I can't believed a wrote a whole post about my $10 haircut... amazing.